- Delayed ejaculation is a rare but serious sexual disorder.
- The cause of delayed ejaculation can be anxiety, physical incompatibility with a partner, systemic diseases, taking medications.
- Treatment of delayed ejaculation consists mainly in the use of psychotherapeutic and training methods, including with sex accessories.
What is delayed ejaculation?
Delayed ejaculation is one of the rarer sexual disorders found in men. Typically, this condition is defined as the inability to complete sexual intercourse with orgasm and ejaculation, despite very long and correct stimulation.
A man affected by this ailment is able to have a long intercourse that will bring full satisfaction to his partner, while remaining unsatisfied himself.
This is often misunderstood, frustrating, and may contribute to further fueling the negative psychological mechanism that is potentially the root cause of the problem.
It should be emphasized that delayed ejaculation is not the same as anorgasmia , i.e. the complete inability to achieve orgasm, regardless of the circumstances. It is a disorder of a slightly milder nature – climax is theoretically possible, although often only during masturbation – solo or with a partner.
Causes of delayed ejaculation
The causes of delayed ejaculation are not well known. Scientists are still moving in the light of more or less plausible hypotheses. It is known that the causes of this disorder can be very diverse and include psychological, hormonal, neurological and many other factors.
Possible reasons include:
- anxiety disorders related to the sexual sphere (fear of failure in bed, rejection, ridicule, unwanted pregnancy, trauma related to a past event, discovery and awareness of betrayal, etc.);
- depression, as well as generalized anxiety disorders and phobias that seem unrelated to sex life, such as fear of death;
- a sense of guilt, related, for example, to a rigorous upbringing in the spirit of religious prohibitions and orders;
- insufficient stimulation caused by a significant maladjustment of the structure of the genitals (small member, loose vagina );
- negative assessment of partner’s sexual attractiveness; insufficient excitement;
- fixation of other patterns of reaching orgasm, for example, only during masturbation;
- hormonal disorders, especially testosterone deficiency;
- systemic diseases and disorders, such as diabetes, atherosclerosis, multiple sclerosis, which affect the innervation and blood supply to the genitals;
- taking certain medications, including for high blood pressure and depression;
- alcohol abuse, smoking, drug use.
Generalized and situational delayed ejaculation
In the first case, we talk about a generalized disorder – the difficulty with achieving orgasm occurs during intercourse with each partner and during masturbation, regardless of the method of stimulation and other factors.
Often, however, this problem is situational. It may occur, for example, only during close-ups with one specific person. In such situations, the reason may be physical incompatibility, asymmetry of feelings, or guilt (e.g. when sex is associated with betrayal).
It may also be that a man comes easily to the top during masturbation, but is unable to orgasm during intercourse. Potential reasons for this state of affairs include: mental and physical fixation of the pattern or stronger pressure of the member with the hand than with the muscles of the vagina.
In addition, in many men autoeroticism is devoid of emotional burdens related to sexual life in a relationship – then there is no fear of failure, negative evaluation, unwanted pregnancy, etc.
Treatment of delayed ejaculation
Treatment of delayed ejaculation depends on the underlying cause of the problem. All kinds of fears that block a man in the sexual sphere usually require long-term psychotherapy.
In various situations and with various partners, actions in the field of cognitive-behavioral psychology (reaching the source of disorders and working on creating new patterns of thinking and acting) may be indicated, but also psychoeducation (making people aware of various aspects related to human sexuality), individually or in pairs.
Masturbation training is also often recommended in such cases. Various types of sex accessories can be used during exercise, including, for example, vibrating penis pads .
Pharmacological treatment may be indicated in the case of depression or severe generalized anxiety disorder. However, you should be aware that the drugs used at that time can aggravate the problem of delayed ejaculation in certain situations.
However, if the cause of the disorder is diseases such as diabetes or atherosclerosis, the basis is the treatment of the underlying disease, under the supervision of a specialist in a given field, e.g. a diabetologist or cardiologist.